my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
I wish I could tell you that the worst thing that happened last night was how he got thrown out of a stripclub for vomitting on the girl giving him a private lapdance. I wish I could tell you that and not be lying.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
At least you got a round of applause for dancing like vanilla ice across the street and into the bar. Even as you were getting carded
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
He has great taste in girls. I feel closer to my Eskimo sisters than my real sister...
Just let me put on a bra and brush the alcohol out of my hair.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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