Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
she told me she had a boyfriend but the alcohol told me she didn't
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
I love how adderall is equivalent to money on a college campus. just got a ride home and paid the driver in adderall...yeeah buddy
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
Have you ever wondered what your stripper song would be?
rumor has it I kept asking you to go to the "tall grass" with me...sorry about that.
I'll send you the picture of you double fisting vodka bottles, grinding one guy and making out with another... Every girl wanted to be you.. You make me so proud!
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
