Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
NEWSFLASH - my freind is drunk and admitted that he hates having sex with dogs. should i help him or let him be??
He also left me a wonderful voice mail..... and is now asking me where the planters peanut guy is.
You should probably go find him.
i've lived in the woods for so long, as long as its post-op, i don't care.
i am literally watching eva make a trashbag diaper for you to sleep in tonight. whole new level of low for you.
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
got my wristband ripped off, was told i can only be served water. please find me, i'll be running through the fountain
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
Nothing screams fatass like a pizza that doesn't fit in your car
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
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