It's finally official that I am from Oklahoma. I'm currently sleeping with my ex-fling's brother.
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Just walked by a yard full of girls wearing bikinis. I did my best to stare.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
we used a swiffer mop as a stripper pole.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I hope dressing like a sexy, but very grown up and intelligent, secretary while out shopping helps disguise how high I am right now.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
I thought the dude was just really enjoying his piss but apparently he was jerkin off into the urinal.
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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