How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
we ran out of wine so you tried to make some by throwing grapes and nail polish remover in a blender.
I went to class with the sex aroma on me. The hot sun doesn't help much.
I took my pants off in the cab and tried to bite his ear. Not going oout for awhile
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Did you make me take pictures of your ass last night because you fucked on some wet paint or did i dream that?
Now that I'm born again, I'm preserving my gift.
Your vagina isn't a White Elephant gift. You can't re-wrap it after it's already been given several times. That's white trash thinking.
The power of my boobs compel you
The number of threesomes I have agreed to seems to increase every time I talk to you drunk...
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
There is no rule that you can't be in a room with more than one dick that's been inside you.
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
Randomize