I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
btw im making up a story about these stitches..... i think a hockey stick to the face sounds better then i fell up the stairs
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
We are sitting here staring into each others eyes, mutually rubbing forks up and down our respective noses. High as balls doesn't even begin to cover it.
He snapchatted me his dick and he's circumcised....BRB going to hug his Mom
So everything was good he was big spoon I was little spoon and then I got peed on
My booty call fought through ice and a foot of snow to get here. He brought booze, food, and cigarettes for three days. My vagina is the greatest motivator of all time.
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
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