you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
I don't know, but I don't want you to think its ok to show up at my house at 4 am with a gorilla suit and a bucket of pinnapple and think id be ok with it
It smelled like mall pretzels. Of course I investigated.
i just had to use the keg as a stool to reach the margarita maker. i'm such a problem solver.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
