they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Not only was there cake on the wall but someone shoved cake and meat in a cup and put it in the fridge.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
So, just in case you go to the bathroom in the middle of the night.. Sam is asleep in the first stall.
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
I just kept hitting the drum to get thru the crowd to the bar. Surprisingly it worked
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
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