Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
and technically it was a rebound
so lol
and then you got rebounded for the same girl he rebounded you for and still never scored ... it was like watching an LA Clippers game
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I am so excited I do not know how I will sleep.
It's like the Christmas morning of dicks
No gay bar. My eyemake up looks like sex and Im using these dick daggers of mine tonight.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Moonshine marathon is never a good idea
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
My boss's toddler just went through my bag and found your vibrator...you owe me a drink.
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