Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
The assistant vp has a bottle of wine on his desk & I have a feeling my boobs will be making an appearance today.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
It's a whole movie about Joseph Gordon-Levitt watching porn and having sex... I NEED to own it..
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
I have a 30 minute video visit blind date tonight with a guy in prison. And it's costing me $9. ROCK... BOTTOM...
Apparently I was directing traffic outside of Keeneland. Apparently I'm not a police officer. Who knew....
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
Randomize