Dude she has a bf and shes on lockdown more than Nelson Mandela in 95
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
He wanted a quickie. I said, can I play doodle jump on my iPhone during? And that's exactly how it went.
omg a stripper jus od'd on stage.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
This girl just stopped in the middle of a sentence because of my blue eyes. She said she got lost in them. I am laying pipe tonight.
there is a dude in the bar with no arms getting fed beers by his friends
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I know you just got dumped by your gf but believe there is still good in the world. I just smoked a joint and took a fucking unbelievable poop. Give me a call tomorrow.
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
Randomize
