I don't think brook has ever known best
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
Bring mistletoe to the strip club, and they feel obligated. they dont even charge you
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Dude before you bang that chick preheat the oven to 425 I wanna make a pizza for afties
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
Can I color on your dick again?
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
WHY HAVE SO MANY THING GONE IN MY BUTT ON THIS TRIP
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Randomize