I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
areolas are like halos for boobs.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seeing two freshman taking a cab home at noon on a Monday makes me realize how much worse my life choices could have been
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Yeah thats cool. We can play the alphabet game while doing bumps of coke in the back of his volswagon
She was hiding under the bed to surprise me with sex. But when you took your hookup in my room to bang things out, she thought I was cheating on her. So explain it to her douche.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just told my mother my "if there are drugs I'm only taking them if I don't have to pay" rule and witnessed her perception of my shatter and crumble behind her eyes.
Did you put Dave Matthews band on the playlist? It's really hard to funnel when "Crash Into Me" kicks in.
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Bored of what? I stayed up all night researching sex toys because I'm excited to do things with you that I haven't done in 29 years of having a body.
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
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