Just fell off a train. Bad.
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
I did the walk of shame to church this morning.
hooker boots and all?
Yep. People looked at me like I was the prodigal daughter returning home. Full of sins but welcome anyway.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
N I'm drinking this invention I call "do-it-fluid" I had a bottle of vodka that was 3/4th empty, so I put in 1/4th rum, 1/4th tequila, 1/4th whisky... it's definitely the worst idea ever..
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
Dude. I keep thinking about how I let a man gum my vagina.
THERE IS A DOG IN THE CLUB. I repeat a dog in the club. I might have laid down and petted it..I have no shame.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
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