what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just took a shot out of my supervisors unzipped jeans. Our staff parties are getting a little too personal
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
The things i do for you...I put all those condoms on a bed, complete with girl, and you sleep in the bathroom
Seriously your house is like the underground railroad for unwanted gay kids
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Really, who hasn't had sex on your bed?
ME.
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
Nothing says Happy Holidays like sending a picture of your ass to the wrong manager.
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
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