bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
We left an ass print on the conference room table, but I don’t think anyone caught on
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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