We are surrounded by old people. Heavens waiting room for sure.
We're like a lot better than the average bears
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
Listen, what he fails to understand is that the Olive Garden does not equal pussy.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
I hooked up with some guy to get over my ex last night. I was terrified until we started doing naked pushups.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
She wouldn't fuck me because I had a cast, so I took her friend home
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
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