Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
So to recap Superbowl Sunday - I won $100, bumped into the anti-christ and his cult, met a guy in a kilt and a wican, then got invited to a gayguy afterhours party.
Gonna be tough to beat that next year!
I heard the bride mutter "I should have brought a fucking tranquilizer". I'm not at all surprised that you got banned from the bar afterwards.
Just brought out that old CCM hockey helmet. The one covered in sharpie penises with "DRUNK BUCKET" written across the front. The number of tally marks / initials from tonight's drunk stunts alone is equal parts inspiring and alarming.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
I will warn you that there is a pic of me riding a buffalo....and for the record, I was completely sober!!
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