Could guys at least pretend I require some amount of money to be spent before I randomly go down on them?
shes still asleep dad put a lobster in her bathroom
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Not as great as when your drunk mom grabbed my junk, but better than when your sober grandma sacktapped me and grabbed my butt.
Did I, at any point last night, say I was dying?
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I boned my sugar daddy for the first time yesterday and now I know why they say guys in their 40s are the best. Also I’m getting a car.
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