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why didn't you poke me back
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
The look I see on guys faces when they realize my nipples are pierced remind me of when my mom used to come home from the grocery store and surprise me with poptarts.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
You kept telling me how warm your bag of vomit was and asked me if i wanted to feel.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
THE ALMIGHTY HAS FALLEN DRUNKENLY OFF HIS HIGH HORSE AND INTO HOLLY'S VAGINA
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
There has been a song made about you fucking his roommate.
It's destiny.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
Two days ago a random guy asked me to sign his forehead 'cause he wanted to have the name of the prettiest girl in the bar on him and never wash it. I just saw him and my signature still there...
I just called my kid butt plug. Does that make me a bad mommy??
This may be the most diplomatic thing you've ever said
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