She is my favorite of all the girls you have fucked. Other than me.
Glitter + Penis = Best. Idea. Ever.
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
Perfect. Let's do that. I'm thinking everclear and green dye as our base. We shud start from there
We always end up having sex in random places after class. I need to stop letting this dude borrow my pens.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't fucking know. I'm out stimulating the economy. Not locked in a room with a marker board.
Oh at the liquor store again?
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
She didn't get a tit job, she's just wearing the right size bra for once
I just brought her a lipstick taser. So just remember that the next time you get smart with her
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
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