and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
i just heard a guy call his kid "Google" in a way that leads me to believe that's his name. this day couldn't get worse.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
I'm at Lowes and I'm constantly looking for things to vomit in, just in case
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
The house is trashed, there is porn scattered everywhere like an easter egg hunt and the blow up doll is sleeping on the couch downstairs. someone covered her up.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
I feel like telling him your vigina was older than him was not a good pick up line.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
Would you like to get an apartment bong? It can be like our pet and we can give it a name.
I just laughed so hard that my back cracked so hard that I thought I was cumming. Magic
Stole my 7th stop sign and 3rd speed limit sign last night. Not even sure how because they were bolted to a cement wall. Tequila gives you strength you didn't know you had.
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