you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Sweet. Warning: i have been drinking at work since 4. Plan accordingly.
When we tried to make a video I set the camera to 3sec pictures accidentally so instead of a movie we have a flipbook of our sex.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
Just introduced myself to a group of people and one dude said "You're Marc!? I've heard many a legend of you." I raised bottle of champagne, said cheers, and drank with them.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
Even with help how did you paint a bullseye around your asshole?
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
