problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
bring money and cleavage
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
We had unprotected sex and she's eating life cereal for breakfast. The universe is telling me get the plan b for her
Three of the best words ever! Cocaine. Research. Study.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
She started crying and told me to leave half way through, I'm walking down main with a bottle of patron and a sweatpants boner.
this better not be you asking for a beej
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
Last night apparently I said "I need a break" and then I just passed the fuck out for 3 hours
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
Randomize
