it turns out vodka filled condoms arent that funny
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
I think after that blow job he got the other day he'd set himself on fire if I asked.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
This is not my bathroom and these are not my pants
There's a fine line between kinky and serial killer
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
Randomize
