dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I don't want to be with anyone who doesn't accept me for who I am. eating cheeseburgers in bed is my favorite activity.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT
I'm sitting next to the guy that peed in our drying machine
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
Hey. You got pizza and sex. How much more can you ask for?
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Hhhaaa He said Peanutburter disinfect lol. Like peanut butter can disinfect stuff. None of those guys are safe
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