did the walk of shame through a baseball field. .A little league game was going on. Proceeded to buy a hot dog at the concession stand. the looks were priceless.
You were pretty committed to that cat costume. Between pukes, you would meow and assure people that you just had a hairball you couldn't get out...
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
Apparently last night I yelled "the cops were called on a mother fucker and that mother fucker is me." And then proceeded to exorcise a sandwitch.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Randomize
