Joe is yelling at the trees again.
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
you know that saying beer then liquer makes you sicker, it should be beer then pickles makes you throw up alot, everywhere.
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
Wat day did I have sex in my sleep? I just made a Dr appt for Friday and I want to talk to her about it
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
ALL I WANT IS SEMEN IN/ON/AROUND MY BODY. WHY IS HE MAKING THIS SO HARD.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
Randomize
