Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Left for charity run at 5AM. Saw a pigeon eating last night's vomit and a pair of shame-walkers in high heels. Nature at it's finest.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
He took a shot, then proceeded to puke into the bucket he was iceing his broken foot in
Ok so now that we've actually had sex do I get the last name or are u really witness protection status?
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
You ran through a field yelling "I'm frolicking! I'm frolicking!" Then fell on your face. How is your nose today, doll?
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
i really didnt think i was that drunk last night but the txts from unknwn #s that say i like your lace panties are def telling me otherwise
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