do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
i'm sure god appreciates how great my boobs look during this fine christmas eve mass
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
People were wondering why I started hanging out with him after high school, the simple answer is now that I don't see his dorky ness everyday I can just focus on his amazing penis.
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
He fucked me over, so I'm going to do what any rational woman does. I'm going to get really high and have sex with his brother.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
Crop dusting thru forever 21
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