I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
Hey its bob the builder. Where did you go?
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
Hey is it bad when your boss leans over your desk and tells you "you smell like the Rainforest Cafe"??
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
I want to fling myself into the sun
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Tequila is never to blame. We all make good choices under tequila
I think people are normalizing furries
I can get weed and taco bell delivered but frozen peas and a loaf of bread are just too scarce, what the hell is wrong with people?
Randomize
