I checked into jail on foursquare
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
He literally stopped in the middle of sex to look up sex positions on his iPhone...
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
She pulled me up to my feet by my hair. I thought it was you for a second. My drunken angel savior.
do you think your dog feels awkward being in the background of your nudes?
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
My Sexting was not on an AP level
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
