so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
there was already a condom in her . . and it was bigger than me
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
I knew it was gonna be weird when she opened the condom with scissors
I was going to call you an awful person for that. but then i realized we're both awful people.
Really* awful people.
I can't be drunk. Sober yes. Drunk no. Spoonfuls
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
Randomize
