She went from zero to smokin in five shots
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just found an uncooked ramen noodle in my underwear
FYI : beer farts in the morning chase women right out of bed!
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
My dad just asked Siri to "help me find my daughters dignity."
If you were my daughter, I'd do the same thing.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I'm going to need a Jurassic park sized pooper scooper to deal with all this shit last night caused.
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
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