My mom says you aren't allowed to eat doritos at my house
just tripped. bootyfest 2012 will be my engagement party. i saw the whole future. i'm moving to the beach.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
The cops forgot your handle of tequila when they took you away. Taking shots in your honor amigo
using the campers leftover pizza money at the bar. Definition of great counselors right here.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
You would be my first round pick for a drinking team
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
She keeps asking if I've seen him... For the last time YES... IN MY BED LAST FRIDAY NIGHT AND THEN AGAIN SATURDAY MORNING
Go makeout with Mickey Mouse so we can get FastPass tickets
It's not even 7 yet. She's singing you are my sunshine to the smirnoff bottle.
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Randomize
