we both passed out while playing beer pong, woke up in the morning and continued to play coffee pong to cure our hangovers
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
We were in the hot tub...he ate the pizza pocket directly out of my mouth
I have to deal with three things I do not like this weekend. Pooping in toilets that are not mine. Air mattresses. Not beating off in the shower.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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