i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
Yeah. He most definitely jizzed himself in the face.
I just opened up the mens room door to a dude pissing in the urinal and pointing at himself in the mirror
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
shes the kind of girl that would cock block endangered pandas
You had one beer and one beer can full of vodka and you took a huge gulp of one of them and called it Emily Roulette
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Stop getting drunk and running away. I can'tell chase you. Iim in heels and have big boobs. Running is a bad idea for me.
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