we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Please just fuck her. She's new to LA and doesn't know anyone nice.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
See,its just the last time this situation happened I ended up hiding in a closet on my birthday
It's finals week and I'm halfway done with this bag of wine and don't plan on stopping. Say goodbye to my GPA
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
Randomize
