Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There was a community pot of Ramen, and if you were in the pool you were either fully clothes or ass naked.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
He asked me if I wanted to play "Edouard Mandevan," turns out that's French for Edward Winehands
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
Randomize