we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
You almost set me on fire last night.
You probably deserved it.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
he was inside of, then got up said "we don't want you having a baby," grabbed his car keys and left. so now i'm just sitting on his bed, wondering if he's coming back.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Hey man, sorry about punching you in the face, also about turning the shower on you. I just really wanted you to drink some water.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
I wonder whether Megan will forgive me if i have phone sex in her attic
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