If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
So... My dad just saw the Plan B package and the beer cans in my backseat.
Oh its cool I'm sure he already knows you're a whore and an alcoholic.
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
DO NOT FUCK HIM ON MY BEAN BAG CHAIR
someone made her a trophy at 4 in the morning and presented it to her in the bathtub
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Missing both credit cards and just had a flashback of grinding my nuts on the terrified cab driver for amusement. i am feeling a slight hate for myself right now.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
I actually cannot wait for your visit. I miss people who make me look like the virgin mary in comparison.
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
I have two bottles of emergency tequila stashed under my desk at work.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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