I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
you should break up with her....give her the gift of reality
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
Just had a shirt made that says "I'm sorry" going to wear it every sat and sun morning for the foreseeable future
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
He woke up wondering who broke in and rearranged all the furniture. He reviewed 11 hours of security footage before I told him he did it while whiskey-drunk.
Its that time in the evening when I've had a few cocktails and wish you'd make a video about the packers and Jack Daniels.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
