I can already tell this is gonna be one of those parties where we sit across the room and text about people.
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
She threw up all over when she was giving me dome. Not even gonna lie, it felt really good.
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
I had to stop mid sex to take my turn on words with friends so he wouldn't get suspicious. Hookup of the night helped me. We won.
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
BABIES FOR EVERYONE. I'd be like Oprah except with babies
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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