imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
She's the only one so far who hasn't laughed at me naked.... I'm gonna marry her.
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
Everytime Our professor said "penis fencing" in class today we took shots.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
