Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
I have discovered something important. The trick to making food taste better is not always 'more hot sauce'.
he was dropping me off and i told him i had to go to the bathroom and i leaned into kiss him and he asked how i went to the bathroom with a tampon up there... he was amazed that their was a third hole...and wanted me to show him where it was
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
everything was going well until edgar threatened to handcuff the security guard to himself.
My body is a temple...that happens to be able to get me free Patron shots at the bar
but it was less of a make out and more of a goodnight kiss as a "thanks for giving our drunk asses a ride home and sorry we called your bar the worst bar in LA"
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
new dating motto: let your guard down, not your panties
I just look at my butt and see so much potential.
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Because, after all, nothing quite says life in 2020 than doing laundry at 9:40 on a Friday morning to make sure you have masks and underwear.
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