I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Fucking him was like shopping for my first training bra.. Embarrassing yet extremely useful
Judging by the crutches in the living room I take it you two are fine and we aren't going out tonight?
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
I forgot to ask you how long you're housesitting. By which I mean how many bones can I get in averaging 2.5 bones per day.
20.
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
My mum just told me to stop being so pathetic and just find someone to have sex with, even if I don't like them, just be grateful for the sex. Wow.
Randomize
