THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
i would think by now you'd realize that my penis does whatever the fuck it wants and i have no control over the situation
Whatever, the fact of the matter is that I saved you from poorly planned outdoor sex by doing a rain dance and you should totally thank me.
We have a guy passed out in the bathroom with one of our pots. Not sure if he's your friend so I let him be
True bitches know their best friends favorite Boones Farm flavor.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
It was the textbook our-balls-touched-while-engaged-in-a-threesome-with-our-bosses-wife conversation.
It amazes and alarms me I'm not shocked to read that.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Somehow I've got the party rigged to where I get a foot massage every time someone wants a beer out of the fridge. Hellz yeah
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Can I borrow a thong? I’m having drinks with a cute boy tonight and I’m out of clean underwear
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