I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.
Why am I the only one concerned that there's a dog in the movie theatre?
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Good. I hope they all got E.Coli from snorting coke off of some homeless prick's asshole.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Finally another gay clarinet player. They're surprisingly rare.
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
thanks for letting me have sex in your bed, too bad you didn't get to yet
who are you?
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