Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
she literally pooped in the closet. i sent the picture to everyone i know.
She hadn't heard about the oil spill. She gave dumb blondes a whole new standard to aim for. I did her anyway...but that isn't the point.
Ya I fucked her.. But now Melissa is gonna find out
Just tell her that in a man's never ending war between his heart and his dick... His heart never wins
I'm too tired to go all the way tonight, especially if you're going to quote Katy Perry at me during
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
I may or have may not just taken a swig out of a jar of alfedo sauce in my fridge. Dont judge me
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
it's 1:30pm and i'm eating cheese while i sext. i need hobbies
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
Randomize
