Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Taylor Swift is so right about you.
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
From inside my college history class i see him waving his arms while holding a beer bong trying to get my attention
Until she magically finds a brain, I'm going to be a dick. Fair trade. She's a idiot, I'm an ass.
Kripsy Kremes at our place, bring your own coffee. And your own donuts because these ones are ours.
Just face planted the stairs. Apparently Santa brought an extra step while I was at the bar... Fucking dick
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
There is nothing wrong with watching parks and rec all day then getting blackout drunk by night
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Where the hell did you pick this girl up? She just licked my cat and stole our last poptart.
it was cool until he whispered 'sounds like you need a good dicking' with a completely serious face and i just lost it
She woke up next me in bed and told me to stop driving so fast.
I have a hunchback of notre dame journal from when I was 6 wherein sits a diary entry that reads "saw liar liar today. Carrey's best yet" and that's all.
Randomize
